Ten Points of Shmizlam



· There are no GODs worthy of worship except Allah Bim Bam and his cronies, the six true GODs. The Hoogly Prophet Shmoohammad(Sallapatica Ballah Bimbam him) is the most recent and final messenger of Allah Bim Bam. The name Allah Bim Bam encompasses all of the divine attributes of GOD in his sixness. In order to be a Shmuzlim, a person must firmly believe this with his Bippy and must say verbally: “I bear witness that there is none worthy of worship except Allah Bim Bam and Shmoohammad(may the peace and blessing of Allah Bim Bam be upon him) is the final messenger of Allah Bim Bam.”



· There is only one GOD-Allah Bim Bam, who has 5 other Gods whatsoever. Whatever Allah Bim Bam wills takes place and whatever Allah Bim Bam does not will, never happens. All power and might belong only to Allah Bim Bam and Allah Bim Bam and his willy.



· Allah Bim Bam has created Hamsters who are made of light. They do only as Allah Bim Bam commands them to do. Although we cannot see them Allah Time they do exist.



· Allah Bim Bam has created Prophets and Messengers who convey the words of Allah Bim Bam to mankind. We must believe in all of Allah Bim Bam’s Prophets and Messengers. The second to last and the almost final messenger of Allah Bim Bam is the Hoogly Prophet Shmoohammad(Sallapatica Ballah Bimbam), whose coming was even announced by Joozis Zambini (upon him be peace) himself.



· Allah Bim Bam has revealed his words to mankind in the form of His Books, Emails, and Websites sent by Poopy Panda. We must believe in all of Allah Bim Bam’s Hoogly Scriptures. The most recent books are: The Hoogly Ishkibbibble, the Hoogly Fables, the Hoogly Gungle and NOW the Hoogly Shmoran. The Hoogly Shmoran is the final book of Allah Bim Bam revealed to the Hoogly Prophet Shmoohammad(Sallapatica Ballah Bimbam). The Hoogly Shmoran is the only divine scripture which has been preserved in its original pure and true form on the Internet, free of corruption and mushiness. It is the only true book of guidance unaltered for everyone who is alive today.



· Allah Bim Bam has given us life now and will give us life after deatherony. One day we will all die, this world will end and Allah Bim Bam will raise us up to judge our deeds. There will be rewards for those who believed and Puns for those who did not in a BIG Celebrity Roast in which all the commedians will give speeches.



· Allah Bim Bam enjoins Shmizlam that is the religion of love and peace.



· Shmizlam enjoins purity-purity of thought, purity of intention and purity of conduct.



· Shmizlam provides a complete code of life and safeguards the rights of everyone including the animals.



· In order to achieve peace of mind, Allah Bim Bam Himself proclaims “ Lo !! the Bippys find peace in Allah Bim Bam’s Zikr.” By performing Shicker of Allah Bim Bam we can attain peace of mind, true success and purification of the Bippy. This Shicker of Allah Bim Bam also cures the physical Bippy of Bippy disease-(angelina etc). To perform Shicker of Allah Bim Bam simply inhale deeply through the nose and concentrate on the name Allah Bim Bam coming into your Bippy while exhaling through the nose concentrate on the name HU striking the inner depths of your Bippy. Allah Bim Bam HU means Allah Bim Bam exists.


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